Loving Your Children

Today I am writing on loving your children. This is not the mushy, "My children are angels" post. Rather it is about loving your children when you don't feel like you like them sometimes. I write this for me, but I pray that there is someone who will read this and be blessed.

There are times when I look at my children and feel such a deep emotional connection to them I can barely contain the excitement I feel as a mother. But then there are times that I look at them and wonder what I am going to do for my sanity for the next several years. It is those moments when they are all fighting, yelling, disobeying, and in general are having a bad day that I momentarily remember my life before kids. There were no kids chaos, no loud noises and arguing from kids who can't get along, no large meals to prepare, no endless laundry piles and the list goes on.

But after that brief memory of my "before" life I have MANY memories of my "after" life. I remember all the kisses and hugs, the sweet I love you words and pictures they draw, the funny moments that even the best comedians can't create, and just the fullness I feel like my life has. As a new mom a few years ago I thought it was wrong to think about the before kids days, but I realize that it is really ok and every mom has those moments at some point in their life. Don't beat yourself up over it.

Here are some of my personal tips on staying "in love" with your children:

1. Prayer! This is ALWAYS the number one action to take in all parts of life. Pray with them and for them.
2. Reading the Bible together.
3. Don't sweat the little stuff. There are plenty of big things ahead. Everything doesn't always have to follow your OCD methods. (This I say from experience.)
4. Go out of your way to surprise them with your actions or with a small gift. (Letting them help cook or buying a little trinket that you know they'll love.) It really does feel better to give than to receive!
5. Sing or dance together. Who cares if you don't sing perfect? Who cares if you can't dance like the pros? What will matter is that your children will have fun and they will see/feel the love coming from you towards them.

ALL relationships require work. Husbands and wives must constantly work on their relationship and safeguard it. Friends put hard work into friendships. Parent/child relationships are no different. There will be ups and downs with each child. Each child will be different so your approaches will differ. Each child will respond to you and reward you differently. You may have one child that rewards your love with notes and letters, while another child may reward your love with spoken words or in action by doing extra chores without being asked.

Love your children while they are young so they will know how to love their own children. Leave a legacy of love for generations to come.